I thought it was funny to share this in a bit more detail.

I am pointing at a story over at engadget, where they reviewed the new mac app store guidelines:

http://www.engadget.com/2010/10/21/apples-mac-app-store-review-guidelines-posted-will-photoshop/

Here are some comments from me:

2.1: Apps that crash will be rejected

2.2: Apps that exhibit bugs will be rejected

At these occasions I really wonder if apple has heard of a "debugger" before. This a kind of utopian philosophy where every app has to be completely free of bugs. Generally speaking: not gonna happen.

Endadget mentioned safari and garageband here. I don't have a mac, fortunately, so I'll take them on their word.

2.3: Apps that do not perform as advertised by the developer will be rejected

iTunes: it is supposed to be great, it is epic fail.

2.4: Apps that include undocumented or hidden features inconsistent with the description of the app

will be rejected

iTunes: long live the rootkit it installs on windows!

2.4: Apps that use non-public APIs will be rejected

Sure Apple's own stuff is open..

2.7: Apps that duplicate apps already in the App Store may be rejected, particularly if there are many

of them

Forget it. VLC won't be in the app store. Long live apple's competition crushing!

2.8: Apps that are not very useful or do not provide any lasting entertainment value may be rejected

Examples: iTunes, Safari, etc

2.11: Apps that encourage excessive consumption of alcohol or illegal substances, or encourage

minors to consume alcohol or smoke cigarettes, will be rejected

You bet I would start drinking after trying to get iTunes to do something for the 100th time...

2.20: Apps that present a license screen at launch will be rejected

credit: engadget

2.24: Apps that use deprecated or optionally installed technologies (e.g., Java, Rosetta) will be rejected

So apple thinks that Java is outdated?! Java is from 1995. Apple's beloved objective-C that is required for iOS development is from 1986!

2.27: Apps that request escalation to root privileges or use setuid attributes will be rejected

uuh.. we cannot install any applications? That doesn't make sense..

3.1: Apps with metadata that mentions the name of any other computer platform will be rejected

"you can also get this app on iPhone!"

*steve presses the big red "reject" button*

4.3: Apps that use location-based APIs for dispatch, fleet management, or emergency services will

be rejected

What does fleet management in the list?! Does it mean I will be able to steer a series of ships from my macBook? coool...

5.2 Apps that suggest or infer that Apple is a source or supplier of the app, or that Apple endorses

any particular representation regarding quality or functionality will be rejected

..So apps delivered through the apple app store are not delivered from apple? Wut..

6.3: Apps that do not use system provided items, such as buttons and icons, correctly and as

described in the Apple Macintosh Human Interface Guidelines will be rejected

, because our buttons rock, and you fail at designing buttons, so we force you to use our crappy old buttons that are now 9 years old.

7.6: In general, the more expensive your app, the more thoroughly we will review it

i.e. the more expensive your app is, the harder we will try to reject it.

10.1: Any app that is defamatory, offensive, mean-spirited, or likely to place the targeted individual or

group in harms way will be rejected

so no shooting games.. great. Good thing we have Steam!

11.3: "Enemies" within the context of a game cannot solely target a specific race, culture, a real

government or corporation, or any other real entity

There goes my idea for the Apple products shoot-em-up..

11.5: Apps that include games of Russian roulette will be rejected.

Is this apple's favourite game?

13.2: Apps that require users to share personal information, such as email address and date of birth,

in order to function will be rejected

No twitter or facebook in the app store.. How jolly!

Conclusion: I am so happy I work on windows!

Long live crapple!