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So, as I am wont to do on occasion, I was spinning my merry way through my spamfolder in search of something that isn't merely boring advertisement. Lo and behold, hidden under a pile of duct tape advertisements lay this gem. As usual, commentary in Red. Attention Payment beneficiary, This e-mail is to acquaint you officially regarding the release of part payment of your contract /inheritance fund totalling $5.5M (Five Million, Five Hundred Thousand United States dollars only) under the auspices of the Debt Management Office (D.M.O) of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. Ah, the check from my great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great grandfather 32 times removed from the old Birthplace of Mankind must have just come through. I've been waiting about a hundred thousand years for this. It will interest you to know that the acting president of Nigeria Professor Yemi Osibanjo have approved and authorized the immediate release of all outstanding debt approved for release by the last two administration that is yet to ne released to the beneficiaries. He's actually the Vice President. The President of Nigeria is named Osikazooie. Everyone knows this. The Debt Management Office (DMO) was immediately asked to produce the list of all beneficiaries both private and cooperate entities for verification before money will be released to them accordingly. During verification it was discovered that several unsuccessful attempts have been made to divert your money. Yeah, one was nearly pulled off by a General Ki Ban-Moon, who was masquerading as some guy in California. We discovered also that your classified payment file have been distorted and some virtal information either lost or intentionally replced to aid the failed attempt to divert your money. Another discovery was the wrong impression created by fake government and bank offcials that the money will be released by cash payment, ATM card, through offshore bank payment etc. You can never trust artificial government. It's like stevia, but it tries to pass laws saying that you must release all your money via offshore bank payments instead of just really bad gas. Be informed that your money will be released to you through bank to bank swift wire transfer direct into your bank account. ATM card and cash payment is not a global acceptable method of payment for such large amount of money. On your reply to this email i will give you further directives on how your money will be released to you. Thanks for your understanding and patience. Is Swift Wire Transfer where they transfer small birds using wires? Sincerely, Mr. Ronald Eze. Debt Management Office. His assistant is named Peze, and when they're not managing debts, they're busy fighting crime as the famous duo, Eze Peze. Quite an upstanding character, 10/10, would get randomly large money from again. Phone: <Interestingly enough, the phone number given maps to a mobile phone actually in Nigeria. I have no cheap way to call it. Oh well...>

Okay, first this blog is overdue. About half a year overdue. I meant to type it up at the beginning of the year, then two weeks in, then at the break, and now I’m finally stopping procrastinating & am actually writing it up. Anyway, the reason I have not been around here nearly as much as a) I was and b) I would like to be is because last year I was at high school = not fantastically amazing and plenty of free time except for the infamous fifteen exams in two-and-a-bit months. Now, my life has taken a most interesting turn and I am at University! I’m studying Mechanical Engineering and have decided to skip the first year and launch straight into the second (it’s a four-year degree). After talking to many people it’s become apparent that by skipping the first year the only thing I’ve missed is large quantities of boredom. Naturally, this is extremely busy, as Engineering is widely viewed as one of the most time-consuming of the degrees. There are two types of engineering students: drunk dropouts who get C’s and D’s, and people who turtle in their studies and work hard. While that’s fairly accurate of any subject, for Engineering the gap is even more pronounced. As such I can’t come over to this wonderful place as much as I’d like. But that is less than half the reason. An important part, yes, but less than half. The other half of the reason lies in the fact that I have never had a social life before. Never. My maximum number of friends at school hit a top of about three, and was usually two. This was because I was at a small school (400 student spread all the way over from 5 year olds to 17 year olds) and there were very few people who were as dedicated to their studies as I was. (The few that did do a large quantity of work were in different years, and they were my few friends). About half of my class wouldn’t mind failing the final year. This made me incredibly lonely – but because I’d never known anything different, that was the status quo and I was fine with that. I’d never known anything else to exist. Then I found RRU and I found a whole bunch of other intelligent gamers (let’s be real, this is a nerd community. I mean that in the nicest way possible. ) Well, you could say that RRU became a very rudimentary form of my social life. I enjoyed chatting to you all even if I was a jerk on multiple occasions (as well as a… uh… rather bumpy introduction…). So for… it’d basically be the past five years, my social life has been non-existent and my friends included two people at school and RRU. Why is this important and why am I ranting to you about it? Because you lot are my friends, in that I can rant to you (and you can just block your ears, that often happens ). I don’t want to name anyone because then those that don’t get named don’t feel so happy, and that’s not the point – the point is that you lot, in a wide sense and with a variable continuum, have been my friends over the past years where I can just come and hang out in the empty, desolate shoutbox. Now University comes into the picture and I have found that there are actually other intelligent nerds that aren’t just on the internet. This is… actually somewhat of a surprise. Not really a “surprise,” just a departure from the status quo for the past thirteen years. As a result, I can now actually say that I have more friends than I can count on one hand for… well, to be honest, the first time in my existence. In fact, more decent friends than I can count on two hands – which is a huge deal for me and you can scoff at it if you like. Go ahead, I’m used to being scoffed at. Story of my life for the past sixteen years. This means… that I don’t need to spend as much time on RRU as normal, because my “socializing” is actually done with people in the real world – yes, that’s phrased awfully, but that hasn’t really happened before. It’s almost as if I don’t need RRU anymore, but that sounds too harsh. It’s just that I now actually have friends in the real world that I can talk to, and RRU is no longer my sole social outpost. This isn’t a farewell letter by no means – rather, it’s a long-overdue explanation of why I’m late. I’ll be around, if I can and when I can to chat with all you wonderful lot (for a given definition of wonderful ). See ya around!