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Zephyria
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This Is Scaring Me...Whenever I Get Mad, I Start Having Suicidal Thoughts...Plus, Its Like I Don't Control Myself, Its Like I Sit Back And Watch As I Do Stuff...

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  • RockmoddeR

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this happens to me too (and im 9 years old!) O_O its scary, its starting to make my fear of the dark and such get even worse and making me think that the next morning I'll wake up in heaven while i watch back down at the earth while my body sits there like a lump. its starting to make me want to eat a poison pill

its starting to make me cry even.

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You people haven't found meaning in your lives yet. I'll be honest with ya'll. I had similar thoughts when I was around... I'm guessing nine or ten. It wasn't until Blockland that I figured out how I could help people, even if my skills weren't that great back then. But it lead me onto a path of video editing, 3D modeling, game programming, and even buying my first computer. The Blockland Era, for me, started when I was fourteen, so it's been a while now. Would I be where I am today without Blockland? I'm sure I would have found meaning in my life in some other fields, but that one single event, that one topic on Xevolution linking me to the Blockland forums... that day changed everything. When you find that event in your life that drastically changes how you will live your life and what things you will do, those thoughts will go away. I guarantee it.

BUT I'M NOT DONE YET! CALL RIGHT NOW AND WE'LL OFFER YOU A CHALLENGE, ABSOLUTELY FREE. JUST PAY SHIPPING AND HANDLING.

I challenge anyone who reads this to delve into their life history and find that event, that moment, that changed your life. That one emoment that started a cascade of life-changing events, that lead you to learn different skills, that lead you to the people that you will influence or who will influence you further. Reflect on that, and realize how different, for the better bu hopefully not for the worse, your life is now.

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TheEPICtrainrider

If you have on where you have the gun to your head, Remember... think of me... and Anon... and Cirevam... and Cyrem... and that guy you like... and warguy... not Joe, don't think of Joe... but think of Rockmodder, your best friends, and Nail and the rest of your friends RRU. Like me braking glass... Anon getting tch slapped... Cirevam being random.. And the rest of our habits.

We're here for you (not really, but I'd say me and Anon can talk you out of a suicidal situation) And if you ever feel bad (plz don't spill your life story, God knows if some of these people are pedophiles)Remember, WE ARE SAFE UNTIL JOE AND MAGARE HACKS US ALL.....

Yes I know that was just creepy, so you really should talk to your parents or something.

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If you have on where you have the gun to your head, Remember... think of me... and Anon... and Cirevam... and Cyrem... and that guy you like... and warguy... not Joe, don't think of Joe... but think of Rockmodder, your best friends, and Nail and the rest of your friends RRU. Like me braking glass... Anon getting tch slapped... Cirevam being random.. And the rest of our habits.

YOU DIDNT MENTION ME!

Anyways, you might want to see your doctor about that.

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You people haven't found meaning in your lives yet. I'll be honest with ya'll. I had similar thoughts when I was around... I'm guessing nine or ten. It wasn't until Blockland that I figured out how I could help people, even if my skills weren't that great back then. But it lead me onto a path of video editing, 3D modeling, game programming, and even buying my first computer. The Blockland Era, for me, started when I was fourteen, so it's been a while now. Would I be where I am today without Blockland? I'm sure I would have found meaning in my life in some other fields, but that one single event, that one topic on Xevolution linking me to the Blockland forums... that day changed everything. When you find that event in your life that drastically changes how you will live your life and what things you will do, those thoughts will go away. I guarantee it.BUT I'M NOT DONE YET! CALL RIGHT NOW AND WE'LL OFFER YOU A CHALLENGE, ABSOLUTELY FREE. JUST PAY SHIPPING AND HANDLING.I challenge anyone who reads this to delve into their life history and find that event, that moment, that changed your life. That one emoment that started a cascade of life-changing events, that lead you to learn different skills, that lead you to the people that you will influence or who will influence you further. Reflect on that, and realize how different, for the better bu hopefully not for the worse, your life is now.

Getting rock raiders all those years ago.

That is what started it.

Then rru made me actually pick up my programming skills and want to improve.

But, just do what has been suggested for all of you.

Who do you help?

What do you have? NOT what you don't have.

How many people would be affected if you were never *gasp* born *gasp*

That last one ends especially.

Hope this helps.

Oh, and picking up playing an instrument as a hobby helps keep you calm.

Just some unproven thing that music makes you smarter and helps motivate you sometimes.

To me? It's prove for the string theory.

Hope this helps...

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If you have on where you have the gun to your head...

Then your parents are idiots for leaving weapons and ammunition within reach of a minor. Another thing you should know is that suicide isn't even a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It's like if you're doing bad in a video game and think you have no chance of winning and you turn the console off, but when you turn it off it explodes. If you have those thoughts now, fine, but remember that it's stupid, especially at our ages. If someone is in their 50's and loses every investment, every asset, absolutely EVERYTHING, some people might consider it then. But remember that there's always a chance. For a person 55 or older, mooching off of taxpayers through Social Security is that second chance. For a teenager, freakin' EVERYTHING is a second chance.

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TheEPICtrainrider

Then your parents are idiots for leaving weapons and ammunition within reach of a minor.

I used that as a expression, not in literal terms.

Also, walking releases endorphins in your brain that stimulate happiness. So if you ever feel bad, take a walk. You should feel much better.

Also, this should be moved to serious discussion.

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My "moment of truth" was ages ago, I must have been about 3. My mum was away, so my dad had to take me to work with him (a hospital at the time). He let me play around the whole day with a paint program on a computer that wasn't in use. That pretty much changed my life and made me into what I am now.

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Meaning of my life?

Trying to Beat Ruckel MS in the Academic tournies.

I'm gonna have them this year.

Just try to be happy.

Watch a nice, happy movie.

Take a walk.

Try to draw.

Drawing can be comforting.

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Try to make computer models, or draw.

Drawing can be comforting.

Trying to make computer models will just enhance the thoughts. >_>

But yes, drawing can be comforting, I agree.

After all is said and done, you shouldn't do it. Everyone (I think) has had a thought like that before, but none of us have followed it. It's not going to last, believe me.

[edit] oops accidental double post

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Play the falling sand game. Very chill.

Falling Sand Game - hosted by Chirag Mehta @ chir.ag

http://chir.ag/stuff/sand/

Also listen to the music while you do.

http://chir.ag/stuff/sand/falling_sand_by_tim_debruine.mp3

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Thanks For All The Words Of Advice, Guys

I Personally Think Its Just Horomones, Nothing So Serious To Call The Doctor About (Im 14, After All)

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Finding RRU deafinitly(incorrect spelling intentional) helped me. I used to think my life sucked and have suicidal thoughts. Then I found RRU. Now I just think my life sucks most of the time. No more suicidal thoughts. Reading this topic just brought that realization out...

Everyone (I think) has had a thought like that

Once one gets old enough to understand the concept of it, I believe everyone does have these thoughts, yes.

Nothing So Serious To Call The Doctor About

Yes, but nothing to be overlooked either.

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I just realised, when i think of the things i mentioned earlier... a feeling... kind of... overpowers me. its very hard to describe, but it feels so... real.

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