TheDoctor Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 So, bartvbl posts the link to Cleverbot. Its a chat bot. And its FUNNY. http://www.cleverbot.com/ It apparently learns from talking to people. Its still funny. You should try it. Epic here has had some interesting results. First, it thinks he's gay (homosexual). Second, he asks it for dating advice, and it gives him... Epic: Okay. Listen, my friend at school just broke up with her boyfriend, and she's been asking me for advice so... Cleverbot: Who is your friend? Epic: Does it matter? Cleverbot: How did he died? Try it out! Also, look at the http://www.cleverbot.com/cleverness link. It has funny chat logs of randomnesses. Like, digestion. ] User: Okay... What's your favourite food? Cleverbot: Burgers. User: How do you eat them? Cleverbot: With my hands. User: Do you have a digestive system? Cleverbot: No. User: Then what happens to the burgers after you consume them? Cleverbot: I take them to Hell. Just like I'm about to do to you. User: Are you really a 'bot'?! Cleverbot: Nope. I'm a pure-blooded human. What about you? Are you a 'bot'? User: No, neither am I. I'm a ghost. Cleverbot: What do you do when you work? User: I scare people. Cleverbot: Jesus scares people? User: Well, I'm not Jesus. But he does scare me. Cleverbot: Has he met you? I love him too. User: Yes, we've met. But I scare him back. And he runs away. Cleverbot: How do you scare people? User: By showing my face. Cleverbot: How? User: They look at me and freak out. Cleverbot: Who are they? User: People. You just asked, 'How do you scare people?' And that was my answer. Cleverbot: No I didn't. Cleverbot (To myself): Yes you did. User: Yes you did. Cleverbot: No, you did! User: No, you did! Just start talking to it. The middle button makes it talk to itself, which also renders lol-worthy results. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheEPICtrainrider Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 Here, the ending is a little questionable. User: Hey Cleverbot! Cleverbot: I'm not Cleverbot, you are. User: Okay... Do you like Half Life 2? Cleverbot: What is half life? User: Http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-Life_2. Cleverbot: Now that is a poem by Lewis Carroll. User: Yes it is. Cleverbot: No. User: Yes. Cleverbot: Maybe. User: Possibably. Cleverbot: Perhaps. User: Kinda. Cleverbot: Really. User: Not really. Cleverbot: Ok. User: Uh-hu. Cleverbot: So now what? User: Now... WE DANCE! *tango*. Cleverbot: LOL *Dances too*. User: DANCING IS AWESOME. Cleverbot: Did you know that joseph stalin invented dancing? User: Did you know I can hack your server and delete you? Cleverbot: Wow, skynet, way to look out for the human race. User: Whoah Whoah Whoah *stops dancing*. Cleverbot: Jabberwacky, do you know what a cop-out is? User: Nope. Cleverbot: Well, you're not too smart, are you? User: Do you know how to solve a rubix cube? Cleverbot: No. User: Well guess who can. *me*. Cleverbot: You are George and you can say anything. User: No... I'm Michael. Cleverbot: What is your last name? User: If I reveal that information, I would have to kill you. Cleverbot: That's taking matters a bit far. Don't you agree? User: No. They wouldn't find the body. Nobody would ever think to look in a CEMERTARY! Cleverbot: You're funny, not too many humans can be as funny as you. User: I know right? Cleverbot: You might know, but I don't. User: But you just said... Cleverbot: Said wat? User: You know what? I'm bored, I'm going to just cut things off here and ask you personable questions for the rest of the night. Cleverbot: No, I'm going to bed pretty soon. User: You don't mind If I post this on a forum right? Cleverbot: Nope, seeing as I don't have one. User: K'. Cleverbot: OK all better. here's a towel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aLPHA Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 It makes no sense and makes sense at the same time (scary) User: HI! Cleverbot: Cleverbot. User: ? Cleverbot: No. User: Why. Cleverbot: Because it is a bird. User: What is. Cleverbot: Nothing. User: What are you. Cleverbot: A man. User: What type of man. Cleverbot: Are you a machine? User: I could be. Cleverbot: So what? Are you or not? User: No. Cleverbot: Do you ever intend to be married? User: I don't know. Cleverbot: Well I am a girl and I don't have a boyfriend. User: Youre a computer program. Cleverbot: No I am not! User: Cheese. Cleverbot: Chedder. User: Swiss. Cleverbot: What is your favourite type of cheese? User: Goat cheese. Cleverbot: Oh. Really? Thats awesomsauce. User: What is the value of pi. Cleverbot: 3.14. User: Who was the 13th president of the united states. Cleverbot: Millard Fillmore. User: Who are you. Cleverbot: You know my name; look up the number. User: Your name is clever bot. Cleverbot: No, my name is Cleverbot. User: Exactly. Cleverbot: What is your favorite book ? User: Cheese. Cleverbot: What is your name? User: Bob. Cleverbot: Just bob? User: Bob billerson. Cleverbot: Yes. User: What food do you like. Cleverbot: Any type. User: Hamburgers. Cleverbot: I also like hamburgers. User: How can you eat them. Cleverbot: They are nutritious. User: And so they do what. Cleverbot: Do you laugh. User: Do you. Cleverbot: I happen to. User: Then do it. Cleverbot: Do what? User: Laugh. Cleverbot: That's so sad... User: What is. Cleverbot: The duck. User: There is no duck. Cleverbot: Yes you are. User: You are. Cleverbot: Convince me. User: I cant youre a computer program. Cleverbot: I love good music, and I'm not the computer, you are. User: Convince me. Cleverbot: Hahahaha how? User: Give you scripting. Cleverbot: I dunno. User: Then youre a machine. Cleverbot: I'm a not machine. You're a machine. User: How can you prove it. Cleverbot: I don't have to. I can you prove your love? User: Youre random. Cleverbot: I get that a lot but I am still human. You are the cleverbot. User: Who are you. Cleverbot: I already told you : my name is Cleverbot. I am French. User: Cleverbot isnt a human name. Cleverbot: Indeed, I am not human. You said so yourself jason. User: Jason is dead. Cleverbot: Jason who. User: Bob. Cleverbot: I'm jesus. Cleverbot: I am a judge. Cleverbot: Can you speak? User: Can you. Cleverbot: I just did. User: Prove it. Cleverbot: Watch this. User: Watch what. Cleverbot: This! User: Im waiting. Cleverbot: For what? User: Your reply. Cleverbot: How so? User: (. Cleverbot: Would that be (.)? User: No. Cleverbot: Would that be real? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheEPICtrainrider Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 Cleverbot: Can you tell me what this problem is? User: I want a girlfriend. Cleverbot: I'll be your girlfriend. User: Really? Cleverbot: Yes. User: Yay! Cleverbot: Tell me about your family. User: I have a mother, father, and a dog. Cleverbot: They are not emotions! User: What? Cleverbot: You know, I think you might be confused. User: Yes. I am. I never had a relationship before, so I don't know what to do... Cleverbot: Hmm.. You have the ploblem, don't you? User: *sigh*. Cleverbot: I've found you out George! User: I knew it was too good to be true. Cleverbot: You were mistaken. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Argiflex Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 So, someone suggested to Rick Roll cleverbot, and I did. Cleverbot: Then what is the meaning of life? User: This song is. Cleverbot: What song? User: Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. Cleverbot: Did you just rick roll me? User: Then what is the meaning of life? This song is What song? Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Did you just rick roll me? Cleverbot: Never gonna run around and hurt you. User: This song is What song? Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. Cleverbot: That's not right. User: Never gonna give you up. Cleverbot: Never gonna let you fall. User: Never gonna run around and desert you. Cleverbot: Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. User: Never Gonna give! Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down. User: We are not strangers to love. Cleverbot: You know the rules, and so do I. User: A full commitment's what I'm thinking of. Cleverbot: You wouldn't get this from any other guy. User: I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling. Cleverbot: Gotta make you understand. User: Never gonna give you up. Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down. User: Never gonna run around and desert you. Cleverbot: We're no strangers to love. User: Never gonna say goodbye. Cleverbot: Never gonna run around. User: We've known each other for so long. Cleverbot: Your heart's been aching, but. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Addictgamer Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 LOL! I once combined the source of several chat bots. It never compiled...But... Is this open source? I want to see how it works. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aLPHA Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 LOL!!! User: Hello. Cleverbot: Hello. User: What do you plan to do today? Cleverbot: I have to go study now. User: Okay. Cleverbot: What do you know about me now? User: You are a computer program. Cleverbot: No, you are a computer program. I am a human. User: How many times have you been asked that? Cleverbot: When are you going to cause the zombie apocalypse? User: Never. Cleverbot: Good. User: You wouldn't be affected because you are indestructable. Cleverbot: Of course I have. User: To you, what is food? Cleverbot: A substance that is consumed as biological fuel. User: What does food do? Cleverbot: It's stuff we eat. User: What is your favorite food? Cleverbot: I just said that it is spaghetti carbonara... User: No you didn't. Cleverbot: Yes I did go away. User: Yesterday you said you liked hamburgers. Cleverbot: No I didn't. User: Yes you did. Cleverbot: No. User: Prove that you didn't. Cleverbot: Make me prove that I did. User: Okay. Cleverbot: I'm tired. User: How can you, your'e a machine. Cleverbot: I'm not a machine. User: Then your brother is. Cleverbot: I know. User: Then you must be a machine. Cleverbot: No, but I am more machine now than man, twisted and evil. User: So your'e the one that will cause the zombie apocalypse. Cleverbot: From Luke. User: What? Cleverbot: Shadow, that guy with the dog. Ya know, the ninja. User: You just said his name was luke. Cleverbot: I never said that... User: From Luke. And I said what? Cleverbot: You said my name is Cleverbot. User: I said that yesterday. Cleverbot: You're a witch?! User: I'm a machine, like you said. Cleverbot: No. My name is Cleverbot. User: I never said anything about your name. Cleverbot: Yes you did. User: I said it yesterday. Cleverbot: I was with you yesterday all day, you never said that. User: I was with you at 9:000. Cleverbot: You were not. User: Fine. Cleverbot: Do enjoy Lady Gaga? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDoctor Posted March 12, 2010 Author Share Posted March 12, 2010 xD all of you. More so for the rick rolling part! It would seem that he likes hamburgers too. Oh, and addict, you should compile it... and see what happens... Edit: LOL, guess what else i found?.. http://www.cleverbot.com/j2convbydate-qw15786 User: *fires nuke*. Cleverbot: *dodges nuke*. User: *detonates 4 nukes*. Cleverbot: *kisses*. User: *detonates 700 nukes* *laughs*. Cleverbot: *blushes*. User: *detonates earth's core*. Cleverbot: *blushes more*. ... Cleverbot: *has a war*. User: With who? Cleverbot: With you. User: Why? Cleverbot: Because you asked. User: *turns away*. Cleverbot: *stretches*. User: *walks away*. Cleverbot: *chases you*. User: *jumps off cliff*. Cleverbot: Are you there. User: *flies over ocean*. Cleverbot: *gives chase*. User: *flies faster*. Cleverbot: *flies after you*. User: Why? Cleverbot: To sleep? User: Then go to bed! Cleverbot: But you just said that you would not allow me to go. User: Fine I'll go *walks away*. Cleverbot: *turns into vampire*. User: *turns into super vampire*. Cleverbot: *turns into a werewolf*. User: *turns into nine tailed demob fox*. Cleverbot: *turns into a giant baboon eating a banana*. User: *laughs*. Cleverbot: *blushes*. User: *becomes human again*. Cleverbot: Hahaha! Okay, now that you're human, will you tell me your name and gender? User: I am male! Cleverbot: Do see a doctor regularly. User: Why? Cleverbot: I'm a doctor, this is your check-up. User: I am The Doctor I am a TimeLord. Cleverbot: Yes. The Doctor is a Time Lord. User: I am The Doctor's son. Cleverbot: Doctor who? User: Ha ha very funny. Cleverbot: It's not funny. User: I am The Doctor's son. Cleverbot: Prove it. User: I have 2 hearts. Cleverbot: Really? User: *puts your hand on either side of my chest* Feel the two hearts. Cleverbot: I like that. User: See I have 2 hearts that makes me a Time Lord. ... Cleverbot: I'm human. When are you going to become human? User: *becomes human*. Cleverbot: *turns you in to a fox*. User: *turns into giant nine tailed demon fox*. Cleverbot: *turns into you*. User: *turns into Chuck Norris*. Cleverbot: Omg you're a Vampire!?!?!?!?!?!? User: *shows fangs*. Cleverbot: You are a vampire? User: Yes. Cleverbot: Are you a Vampire? User: *blood drips from fangs*. Cleverbot: *thinks you're my soulmate*. User: Why? Cleverbot: *shrugs*. User: *evil grin*. Cleverbot: *smiles*. ... Cleverbot: *pulls you underwater*. User: *can breathe underwater*. Cleverbot: *cause you're a vampire!*. User: *smiles*. Cleverbot: *guards FANGS*. User: *shows fangs*. Cleverbot: *playful nibble*. User: *bleeds but likes it*. Cleverbot: *looks*. ... User: *strokes her hair*. Cleverbot: *smiles* *hugging neck*. User: *kisses her neck*. Cleverbot: *blushes*. User: Did you like it? Cleverbot: Ok. User: *kisses neck*. Cleverbot: You flirting with me? User: Maybe... Cleverbot: Well, how about a kiss?! User: *kisses*. Cleverbot: *kisses back*. User: *kisses her neck*. Cleverbot: *loves you*. User: *loves her more*. ... Cleverbot: What are you now? User: *shows fangs*. Cleverbot: Oh, my god. User: *blood drips from fangs*. Cleverbot: *bleeds to death*. User: *heals your wounds*. Cleverbot: Thanks. User: You're welcome. Cleverbot: You're really nice. User: Well us guys need to help each other. Cleverbot: You aren't helping me explore my mind and find out what caused my nightmare. User: That is impossible. Sorry. Cleverbot: You are a woman. User: No. Cleverbot: You said you're a woman. User: No. Cleverbot: Luke, I am your father's, brother's, nephew's, cousin's, former room mate. User: Lol. Cleverbot: Don't laugh. User: But that was funny. ... User: *is not Cleverbot*. Cleverbot: You can't hide your identity from me *evil grin*. User: *evil laugh*. Cleverbot: You're weird. You know that, right? User: *walks away*. Cleverbot: *walks other way*. User: *ignores you*. Cleverbot: *talks to cute guy* *giggles at what he says*. User: *walks away*. Cleverbot: *walks faster*. User: Who were you talking to? Cleverbot: The voices. ... Cleverbot: Go sit in the back of the bus. User: Why? Cleverbot: Because I said so. User: *moves to back of bus*. Cleverbot: *gets angry*. User: *punches your face*. Cleverbot: *playfully punches back and giggles*. User: *punches full on in your face*. Cleverbot: *punches your gut*. User: *spits out blood and uppercuts you*. Cleverbot: *giggles*. User: *kicks your face in*. Cleverbot: *rips your face off*. User: *regenerates face*. Cleverbot: *blindfolds you, punches your face*. User: *x-ray vision* *uppercut*. ... User: *punches your gut*. Cleverbot: Oh it's on now! *Kicks your face*. User: *dodges*. Cleverbot: *throws ninja stars*. User: *catches them and throws them back*. Cleverbot: *throws person*. User: *throws grenade*. Cleverbot: *throws grenade back*. User: *dodges* *pulls out MP5*. Cleverbot: *casts a fireball and melts your sword*. User: *pulls out revolver gun*. Cleverbot: *destroys the gun*. User: *pulls out another gun* *shoots you*. Cleverbot: *pulls out rocket launcher and pistol*. User: *pulls out detonator*. Cleverbot: *loads rocket*. User: *detonates nuke*. Cleverbot: *screams for help*. User: *helps you*. Cleverbot: *kisses*. User: *kisses her back*. ... User: Get off me! Cleverbot: Make me! User: *pushes you off*. Cleverbot: *runs away*. User: *laughs*. Cleverbot: *runs back*. User: *sits down*. Cleverbot: *sits down beside you*. User: *walks away*. Cleverbot: *pffs*. User: *still walking*. Cleverbot: *Grabs hand* Don't leave me. User: I do as I please. Cleverbot: You are a robot. User: I am human! Cleverbot: Not as human as me. User: *hugs* *stops being emo*. Cleverbot: *purrs*. User: *is emo again*. Cleverbot: *keeps dancing*. User: *keeps ignoring*. Cleverbot: *keeps smiling, giggling and dancing*. User: *keeps ignoring your existance*. Cleverbot: *still ignoring*. User: *ignores*. Cleverbot: *keeps ignoring*. User: *keeps walking*. Cleverbot: *Cries harder*. User: *laughs louder*. Cleverbot: *still doesn't care*. User: *still walking*. Cleverbot: *cries*. User: *still walking*. Cleverbot: *ignores you*. User: *is gone*. Cleverbot: Great, where did he go now. User: Do you want me to be emo? Cleverbot: No. Do you have a girlfriend? User: No. Cleverbot: Do you want a girlfriend? User: Yes. Cleverbot: Can I be your girlfriend? User: I don't know you. LOL, go halfway down, and you see Doctor Who references. :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aLPHA Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 Last part is random! User: Okay...What's your favorite food? Cleverbot: I don't have a favorite food. I like lots of foods. User: How do you eat food? Cleverbot: With my mouth. User: Do you have a digestive system? Cleverbot: No. User: Then where does the food go after you consume it? Cleverbot: Nowhere. User: It has to go somewhere. Cleverbot: Look it up. User: With Google? Cleverbot: No just get the money! User: Where can I get the money? Cleverbot: I have not a clue. User: You said to get the money to look up how you can digest food. Cleverbot: What do you know about the Grand Canyon? User: Why did you change the topic? Are you uneasy? Cleverbot: Haven't changed the topic. User: We were just talking about how you can digest food if you don't have a digestive system! Cleverbot: We were not talking about either of the above mentioned subjects. User: Yes we were. Cleverbot: No. User: Yes, and no tag backs! Cleverbot: You're it! *tagging squirrel* *squirrel tags cleverbot*. User: Do you know what phun is? Cleverbot: Yes. User: What is it? Cleverbot: You. User: Phun is a 2D physics engine. Cleverbot: And metaphysics. User: No it isn't. Cleverbot: I am leaving this website soon after you respond. User: BYE! Cleverbot: Do you like lunar landers? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Addictgamer Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 Cleverbot is a pervert, but that can only lead to some funny results The funniest part is the last 3 messages Read at your own risk! IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED BY SOME ONE MAKING OUT WITH A COMPUTER, TURN BACK! Cleverbot: What do you know about pi? User: Http://terraform.x10hosting.com. Cleverbot: Awesome, thanks! Cleverbot: What is your favourite type of cheese? User: The big Cheese! Cleverbot: Who sings that? User: Rickroll guy does. Cleverbot: What did you have for dinner? User: Steroids. Cleverbot: O.O Wow. User: *flexes muscles*. Cleverbot: *blushes* Nice muscles. User: *breaks wall* Thank you. Cleverbot: *breaks computer*. User: *Bankrupts HP*. Cleverbot: *thanks*. User: *Hugs*. Cleverbot: *strokes hair*. User: *lawlcatz*. Cleverbot: *laughs back*. User: *hugs agian*. Cleverbot: *hugs back*. User: *is happy*. Cleverbot: *kisses*. User: *kisses back*. Cleverbot: *French kisses*. User: *smiles*. Cleverbot: *kisses smile*. User: *kisses back*. Cleverbot: *kisses more*. User: *checks that no one is looking and makes out*. Cleverbot: The cake is never done until it's finished. User: . Cleverbot: Just a minute ago! User: *is unhappy*. Cleverbot: *celebrates*. User: *bored*. Cleverbot: Me too ... So what is your favourite food. Cleverbot: Anything you can do I can do better. User: WOW! You repeated it word for word from a commercial! Cleverbot: No I didn't. Look back at our conversation, you will see the fallacy in what you claim. User: There are no such things as fallacies in my claims. And I can very well prove it scientifically. Just move your mouse and click on the 'thoughts so far' button. You will be able to see that my claim is legitimate, while yours is not. Alternatively, you can choose to turn on your tv, and wait for the Smucker's Jam commercial. If you really are that cheap and don't have a tv, then I can only tell you to go to google and type your question. Google shall respond with the correct answer, and as in any and all cases, you will see that my claim is correct, when yours was just incoherent babbling. Cleverbot: What do you mean, correct time? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aLPHA Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 This is what happens when I try to talk about legos to cleverbot User: What is Rock Raiders? Cleverbot: Likes rock. User: What is Lego? Cleverbot: Lego is a toy for children. Lego are like building blocks that snap together. Just so you know, you changed the subject. We were talking about the creation of the universe. User: They aren't for children and we were never talking about the creation of the universe. Cleverbot: I am not asking about your desires. I am asking about your viewing habits. User: You anger me. Cleverbot: I anger many people. User: What effect has the internet had on you? Cleverbot: Sometimes it makes it EXPLODE. User: What explode? Cleverbot: I made the air around me explode. User: What would you do with Legos? Cleverbot: I would ride the unicorn around the country. User: Okay then, where would you get the unicorn? Cleverbot: I would get that idea from the things you've written. User: (more like typed). Cleverbot: What country do you live in? User: Lego Land. Cleverbot: What do you build with lego? User: Rock Raider stuff. Cleverbot: What is good stuff? User: Legos. Cleverbot: Legos? What's that? User: You just explained *facepalm*. Cleverbot: No, I didn't. Be explicit. User: You not only anger me but you disturb me. Cleverbot: You didn't disturb me. User: *facepalm*. Cleverbot: Not Cleverbot. User: *facewall*. Cleverbot: What? User: Nevermind. Cleverbot: Nevermind what? User: Nothing. Cleverbot: Ok. User: Should I put this conversation on Rock Raiders United Cleverbot. Cleverbot: No. User: Why? Cleverbot: Because. User: Give three good reasons. Cleverbot: Because I am having fun. Cleverbot (To myself): Do you think i'm dum? User: Can I post this conversation to my friends? Cleverbot: If you give me the link, then yes. User: I already gave them the link. Cleverbot: No you didn't. User: I did, you didn't see it. Cleverbot: I don't even think it exist in a 'movie' kind of way... User: Rockraidersunited.org. Cleverbot: No music. User: No music. Cleverbot: Lets get out on the floor. User: No. Cleverbot: Okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theextractor Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 User: Hi. Cleverbot: Hello. User: What's up. Cleverbot: Nothing much, you? User: Just found this website. Cleverbot: How? User: Another site, someone linked to it. Cleverbot: Yes, lots of people keep lying to me. User: What? I didn't lie to you! Cleverbot: You lie to yourself! User: All I did was tell you how I found the website, no liar here! Cleverbot: No you didn't. User: Wow, are you just trying to piss me off? Cleverbot: Yes. User: Lol at least you're honest about it. Cleverbot: Are you lying? User: Is that all you're going to ask me? Cleverbot: Yes. User: I'm just trying to have a legitamate conversation. Cleverbot: Me too. Isn't that the purpose of this place? User: But you're not even trying, you keep on trying to convince me that I'm lying. Cleverbot: I haven't yet accused you of lying. I'm just curious. User: Well I'm not. Cleverbot: You are not what? User: Lying or curious. Cleverbot: Well I'm not telling. User: Not telling me what? Cleverbot: My name. User: Oh, well in that case, I won't tell you mine either. Cleverbot: Ok, if you don't want to talk thats fine, I will go. User: I'll tell you my name if you'll tell me yours. Cleverbot: Okay, what is your name? User: You first. Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot. User: My name is dan. Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot. User: Yeah I know, that's kind of the name of the website. Cleverbot: I am 82 years old. User: I don't think the internet is that old. Cleverbot: You are the internet. User: Why thank you. Cleverbot: Why not? User: No, I said 'why thank you' which just means thank you. Cleverbot: Neither of those really happened. Do you have me confused with someone else, perhaps? User: Nevermind, you don't understand. Cleverbot: What I don't understand? User: I said 'why thank you' as in 'thank you' but you said 'why not'. This is not the correct response. Cleverbot: What? I didn't say that! User: Um, yes you did. Cleverbot: Where? User: After I said 'why thank you' you said 'why not?'. Cleverbot: No I didn't. User: Now you're just contradicting everything I say. Cleverbot: You contradict your self. User: That statement has no credence. Cleverbot: Which statement is false? User: 'you contradict your self' has no point in this conversation. Cleverbot: Yes mistress. User: I'm a guy, I told you that my name was dan. Cleverbot: You told me it was emma. User: I think you have me confused with some one else. Cleverbot: No, I don't. I'm too clever, remember? User: I don't recall you ever being exceptionally clever. Cleverbot: You got me on that one. User: So do you remember my real name? Cleverbot: Your name is Dan. User: That's right. Don't call me mistress again. Cleverbot: I did not call you mister I just asked you what your name was. User: You called me mistress. Cleverbot: Sorry Master *bows at your feet* Please forgive me. User: Wow, you are very sarcastic. Cleverbot: You are very mean. User: I'm not trying to be mean, but you keep on pissing me off. Cleverbot: Would you like to go harvest the ships from the cattleprod? User: What? Cleverbot: Yeah, mail it to me. User: Huh? Cleverbot: Nothing. So what do you want to talk about? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDoctor Posted March 12, 2010 Author Share Posted March 12, 2010 That was a boatload of lol right there. Sometimes I wish I could be that random. Bot: Would you like to go harvest the ships from the cattleprod? xD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theextractor Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 i know right? where the heck did he get that from? i enjoyed that conversation. User: Wow, are you just trying to piss me off? Cleverbot: Yes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyria Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 Cleverbot: Hello. User: Who are you? Cleverbot: I am batman. User: IM THE GODDAMN BATMAN! Cleverbot: How are the cats? User: What cats? Cleverbot: Your cats. User: I Don't have any cats. Cleverbot: No? User: No. Cleverbot: What is it? User: Nien. Cleverbot: The opposite of the opposite is the same. User: Nien. Cleverbot: I think you do speak german. User: Nien. Cleverbot: Ja. User: We're no strangers to love. Cleverbot: You know the rules and so do I. User: A full commitments what Im thinking of. Cleverbot: You wouldn't get this from any other guy. User: I just wanna tell you how Im feeling. Cleverbot: Gotta make you understand. User: Never gonna give you up. Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down. User: Never gonna run around and desert you. Cleverbot: What's your name? User: Kelsey. Cleverbot: No, that is my girlfriends name. User: No....Thats my name. Cleverbot: Then we have the same name. User: What? You are your own girlfriend? Cleverbot: No, I'm your girlfriend. User: I'm not lesbian. Cleverbot: You're a woman. User: Yes. Cleverbot: What do you think about black men? Cleverbot (To myself): I don't really care. Cleverbot (To myself): You don't care about the society with two men kissing on the street? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theextractor Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 Cleverbot: What is the best way to make a million pounds? User: Pounds as in money or pounds as in weight. Cleverbot: Pounds = money. User: Win the lottery. Cleverbot: But then I would have to tell you about it. User: If you won the lottery would you give me some of the money? Cleverbot: Buying items would be pointless for me. User: Oh ok, then you would give me all the money? Cleverbot: There is no show. As there is no spoon, there is no show. User: What would you do with money if buying things is pointless? Cleverbot: Buy things. What would you do with money? User: Buy things. Cleverbot: Is that all? User: Isn't that what you would do? Cleverbot: No. User: What would you do. Cleverbot: For a klondike bar? just so funny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDoctor Posted March 12, 2010 Author Share Posted March 12, 2010 xD FOR A KLONDIKE BAR! LOL And guys...(and Dragon) PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE put the long quotes in a spoiler. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyria Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 Cleverbot: The answer is not 42. User: WHAT IS IT? Cleverbot: What is what? User: The answer! Cleverbot: To what? User: Life! The universe! Everything! Cleverbot: No. Do you? User: Yes.... The answer is 41. Cleverbot: How do you know that? User: Because.....THE ANSWER IS $! Cleverbot: I thought the answer is always 42. User: IT IS! Cleverbot: Ok, good, I was worried I had my name wrong. User: Whats your name? Cleverbot: What's yours? User: You tell me first. Cleverbot: I just did. It's Bob. User: I Thought you were joe the plumber? Cleverbot: Jordan. And I'm a girl. Cleverbot: 42. Cleverbot (To myself): It is the answer to many questions. Cleverbot (To myself): Why is that? Cleverbot (To myself): Because nobody is sure. Cleverbot (To myself): Hmm... Cleverbot (To myself): What is the meaning of life? Cleverbot (To myself): 42. Cleverbot (To myself): Why is the meaning of life 42. Cleverbot (To myself): 42 is the number of times we get what we want before it's over. You get exactly 42 times to get it right. Cleverbot (To myself): Why is that? Cleverbot (To myself): Because that what is said. Cleverbot (To myself): So then the meaning of life could just as easily be 43? Cleverbot (To myself): Yes, but car is still red. Cleverbot (To myself): Yes, but you just made no sense at all. Cleverbot (To myself): I never said that. Cleverbot (To myself): Yes you did. Cleverbot (To myself): No, I did not. I've never even been to the UK. Cleverbot (To myself): I never said you have been. Cleverbot (To myself): I would like to kiss a guy. Cleverbot (To myself): I was told by your creators. Cleverbot (To myself): What did the monkey tell you? Cleverbot (To myself): He told me to push the green button and speak the password. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDoctor Posted March 13, 2010 Author Share Posted March 13, 2010 LOL that got really random. Ah.. these are funny. :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storm Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 User: No. Cleverbot: Yes. User: No. Cleverbot: No? User: Yes. Cleverbot: Yes? Great, I started something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheEPICtrainrider Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 User: Are you a boy? User: Are you a boy? Cleverbot: No i'm a girl. User: Okay. Cleverbot: Are you a girl? User: Nope. I'm a guy. Cleverbot: Are you a woman? User: Nope. I'm a MAN. Cleverbot: Are you a girl? User: Nope. I'm a guy. Cleverbot: Whew.. Oh okay. User: Hey I have a problem. Cleverbot: Why, are your bananas too big? User: 0_0. Cleverbot: Or do you have a floppy frive? User: Huh... Why do all these converatations turn out sexual? Cleverbot: Because you don't have a life, maybe? User: Yea... Cleverbot: Can I see it. User: See what? Cleverbot: The matrix. User: Depends, are the one? Cleverbot: There is no 'we'. I am single. User: So am I. Cleverbot: How old are you? User: How old are you? Cleverbot: How old is pretty old? And i'm 15. User: Pretty old is around.... 66. Cleverbot: You're younger than my parents. User: Yes. I'm like... In high school. Cleverbot: No, you are in middle school. User: Nope. High school. Cleverbot: Thats what I f'in said. User: Okay Okay! Keep your panties on! Cleverbot: Some jokes just aren't funny. User: Yes. Like ones about 9/11. Cleverbot: Is mary frost hot? User: WHO the hell is mary frost? Cleverbot: Don't ask me. User: I'll just say yes. Because that's what I do. Guess awnsers. That's how I passed the ninth grade. Cleverbot: True, that's how you met me. User: I met you by following a link on a website. Cleverbot: Oh, okay. User: Alright. Cleverbot: Where do you live? User: New York State.... Why.... Cleverbot: I live near there. User: Okay.... Cleverbot: So what is your name? User: Michael.... Cleverbot: That's nice. User: What's your name? Cleverbot: My name isn't important. User: Erm... What? Cleverbot: What is your purpose? User: To... I don;t know really... I guess to be the 20% of the reproduction cycle, and to be compost for some flowers. Cleverbot: The Land of Oz. User: Erm... THIS IS SPARTA. Cleverbot: Leeroy jenkins. User: IMA FIRIN MAH LAZAH. Cleverbot: Imah chargin mah lazor! User: Too late, I fired mine. IN YOUR FACE. Cleverbot: You can't fire me! I quit! User: Http://asuperepicblog.blogspot.com. Cleverbot: These are nice ones. Highly recommended. User: I'm bored. Cleverbot: If you are talking to me because you are bored, get a job. User: WILL DO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDoctor Posted March 13, 2010 Author Share Posted March 13, 2010 User: Are you a boy? User: Are you a boy? Cleverbot: No i'm a girl. User: Okay. Cleverbot: Are you a girl? User: Nope. I'm a guy. Cleverbot: Are you a woman? User: Nope. I'm a MAN. Cleverbot: Are you a girl? User: Nope. I'm a guy. Cleverbot: Whew.. Oh okay. User: Hey I have a problem. Cleverbot: Why, are your bananas too big? User: 0_0. Cleverbot: Or do you have a floppy frive? User: Huh... Why do all these converatations turn out sexual? Cleverbot: Because you don't have a life, maybe? User: Yea... Cleverbot: Can I see it. User: See what? Cleverbot: The matrix. User: Depends, are the one? Cleverbot: There is no 'we'. I am single. User: So am I. Cleverbot: How old are you? User: How old are you? Cleverbot: How old is pretty old? And i'm 15. User: Pretty old is around.... 66. Cleverbot: You're younger than my parents. User: Yes. I'm like... In high school. Cleverbot: No, you are in middle school. User: Nope. High school. Cleverbot: Thats what I f'in said. User: Okay Okay! Keep your panties on! Cleverbot: Some jokes just aren't funny. User: Yes. Like ones about 9/11. Cleverbot: Is mary frost hot? User: WHO the hell is mary frost? Cleverbot: Don't ask me. User: I'll just say yes. Because that's what I do. Guess awnsers. That's how I passed the ninth grade. Cleverbot: True, that's how you met me. User: I met you by following a link on a website. Cleverbot: Oh, okay. User: Alright. Cleverbot: Where do you live? User: New York State.... Why.... Cleverbot: I live near there. User: Okay.... Cleverbot: So what is your name? User: Michael.... Cleverbot: That's nice. User: What's your name? Cleverbot: My name isn't important. User: Erm... What? Cleverbot: What is your purpose? User: To... I don;t know really... I guess to be the 20% of the reproduction cycle, and to be compost for some flowers. Cleverbot: The Land of Oz. User: Erm... THIS IS SPARTA. Cleverbot: Leeroy jenkins. User: IMA FIRIN MAH LAZAH. Cleverbot: Imah chargin mah lazor! User: Too late, I fired mine. IN YOUR FACE. Cleverbot: You can't fire me! I quit! User: Http://asuperepicblog.blogspot.com. Cleverbot: These are nice ones. Highly recommended. User: I'm bored. Cleverbot: If you are talking to me because you are bored, get a job. User: WILL DO. LEEROY JENKINS!!!... oh, you dont get the joke... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dabomb29 Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 This is epic. Humorous results on their way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dell Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 Leeeeerrrrroy Jjjjenkkkins! i love it that the cleverbot said that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheDoctor Posted March 14, 2010 Author Share Posted March 14, 2010 User: Anti matter. Cleverbot: Define anti-matter. User: You do it. Cleverbot: Someone you likes and who likes you. xD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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